5.45am this
morning and I’m trying to drink my coffee in peace and check emails
on my phone. I thought you would be interested to see my
up-close-and- personal friend who had his eye on a few bits of
Carbonara pasta left on the kitchen table. “Come on mum. I’m
starving”. I caved in for the simple reason Ollie salivates like
Niagra and its only a matter of time before one of us slips on the
stuff and ends up at A & E.

As usual I
was lured in by the “reduced” shelf at the local supermarket on
Sunday and came home with a few items for teenage snacking. The
Lizi’s On The Go Granola packets looked really interesting and at 50p
a shot it was worth buying a couple. I could have bought a large
500g packet of own-brand Granola for not much more but – every time
I’ve bought cereal in the past half of it gets left in the cupboard
and 8 months later ends up in the bin. Cereal would rot the dogs
teeth and vets bills are expensive. I can still get human fillings
for kids on the NHS. Anyway, Lizi’s (whoever she is) On The Go was
found by Hayley when she surfaced from her stink-pit at 11.00am. Her
idea of being On The Go was to stand at the sink reading the
instructions: 1. Open Packet by pressing down along the dotted line
2. Pull packet open 3. Put in 2 tablespoons of water 3. Mix
thoroughly 4. Consume. It took her 30 seconds to fulfil the last
instruction because there was only about 3 tablespoons in the packet.
“A bit sweet” was the verdict, followed by “Mum what can I
have for breakfast?”

Ok, so,
let’s go through Lizi’s (whoever she is) On-The-Go theory, taking a
moment to review it with a normal packet of cereal….. 1.Walk to
cupboard. 2 .Open cupboard, bend down and get a bowl. 3. Close
cupboard. 4. Walk to opposite cupboard. 5. Open cupboard and take out
cereal packet. 6. Shut cupboard. 7. Open cereal packet, lift and pour
required amount into bowl. 8. Walk or jog to fridge. 9. Open fridge
and get milk. 10. Walk or jog back to bowl (really getting into
this!) 11. Lift milk carton and pour onto cereal. 12. Pick up spoon.
13. Consume. ….. Phew! I’m tuckered out!

I had a near
epiphany with the Mug Shot. This flew into my trolley with Noel in
mind. And it’s Guilt Free! Wow! I am a parent….. a woman….. a
mother! Guilt is my middle name. Oh yes! I’m a Catholic as well!
……. Can I bulk- buy? ………….

Oh, hang
on…….I think it’s talking about the fat content. It’s only got
2.3g of fat in it….

Amongst the
ingredients are:- Sugar, Dipotassium Phosphate, Trisodium Citratel,
Dried Glucose Syrup, Maltodextrin and Stabilisers………but hey
ho, I can feel guilt free giving it to my teenage (skinny) son
because it contains hardly any fat.

Noel said
it wasn’t as nice as the Pot Noodle.

“Isn’t a
Mugshot one of those photos you have when you go to prison? Noel
asked.

“Yeah….and
I’m feeling a bit like one now”.

I’ll live
with the guilt.